Biden deploys 2 AT-ATs to defend White House against ‘rebel scum’
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden has deployed two All Terrain Armored Transport (AT-AT) vehicles to the White House to defend against "rebel...
military
DoD quietly adds new DEFCON levels for Biden food cravings, poopy pants
WASHINGTON, DC—The Office of the Joint Chiefs of Staff has notified media outlets that the Department of Defense has added...
BREAKING: Biden to replace unvaxxed soldiers with army of Rachel Levine clones
WASHINGTON, DC—Facing pressure from an increasingly hostile and militaristic China, President* Biden has approved a program to replace all military...
BREAKING: Biden gives Taliban weapons, tanks, drones ‘so it’ll be a fair fight next time’
WASHINGTON, DC—According to reports the Taliban seized US weapons, munitions and military equipment such as armored tanks and military vehicles....
Biden launches the US Gay Force to enforce pronouns
WASHINGTON, DC—In response to former President Trump's Space Force and just in time for Pride Month, President* Biden has launched...
Biden awards AOC the Purple Heart for her bravery in the War of January 6th
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden awarded Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) the prestigious Purple Heart medal for her military valor in the War...
BREAKING: US military to accept people who identify as good soldiers but are biologically no-skill fat slobs
WASHINGTON, DC—In a brave path forward under the Biden administration, the Pentagon is set to eliminate all discrimination in the...
Biden: ‘I’m very excited to have Transformers in the US Military’
WASHINGTON, DC—President Joe Biden was excited to hear that, "the US Military would be allowing Transformers to serve," overturning a...
Biden to target more women in his Syrian airstrikes than any previous president
WASHINGTON, DC—Worried about claims that his first military action as commander in chief would unfairly leave out females, President Biden...
BREAKING: Guy deciding who’s an ‘essential worker’ decides he is an essential worker
There is so much wrong with what's been going on these last two months it's hard to know where to...
