BREAKING: Biden never officially declared innocent of rape

The Mueller resignation press conference has opened the flood gates of condemnation in accordance with the new standards of jurisprudence he afforded Donald Trump being not not guilty.

Immediately critics of presidential candidate and former Vice President Joe Biden have pounced on the fact that he has never officially been declared innocent of rape.

“Biden is not not guilty of rape and so, we can infer that he’s never been proven innocent,” political analyst Fredrick Smarm explained.

Other allegations of similar magnitude have come to light since the Mueller resignation.

  • Bernie Sanders has never officially been declared innocent of tax fraud.
  • Elizabeth Warren has never officially been declared innocent of identify theft
  • Robert “Beta” O’Rourke has never officially been declared innocent of drug smuggling
  • Kamala Harris has never officially been declared innocent of running a sacrificial cult out of her California basement

“It’s about to get ugly in politics now that this is the standard,” Smarm added.