Des Moines Woman Says She Discovered Miraculous Candy Corn
DES MOINES — A woman in central Iowa reported Thursday that a piece of candy corn in a newly opened...
Religion
Biblical Scholars Now Conclude that Judas’s 30 Pieces of Silver Were Supplied by USAID
JERUSALEM — A consortium of biblical historians and institutional-funding analysts announced Monday that the thirty pieces of silver paid to...
AOC: Religion, Patriarchy, and Homophobia are Evil, Unless You’re Muslim, In Which Case, They’re Diversity
Let me be crystal, like, structurally clear: religion, patriarchy, and homophobia are violence. Not “beliefs.” Violence. They are how power...
BREAKING: UK Terror suspects all released after explaining that terror is an expression of their religion
UNITED KINGDOM—Five men arrested near RAF Fairford on suspicion of preparing a terrorist act and explosives offences have been released...
Talarico: ‘We Should Mandate Abortions Unless Parent Pledges to Raise the Baby Trans’
AUSTIN — U.S. Senate candidate James Talarico said Saturday that the federal government should require abortions for American citizens unless...
Climate Scientists Pray to Climate Goddess Greta to Bring Hurricanes And Fulfill Al Gore’s Prophecy
Climate advocates assembled at first light Tuesday on a public pier over the Gulf of America to petition Greta Thunberg,...
Girl Scouts Replace Entire Cookie Line With Halal Falafel Delight
NEW YORK — Girl Scouts of the United States of America announced Wednesday that every traditional cookie variety will be...
Girl Scouts Roll Out Merit Burkas
NEW YORK — Girl Scouts of the United States of America announced Tuesday two new badges intended to broaden participation...
Airports Installing Aztec Human Sacrifice Stations Beside Muslim Foot-Washing Facilities
DALLAS — Several major U.S. airports have begun installing dedicated Aztec human sacrifice stations adjacent to existing Muslim foot-washing facilities,...
Harry and Meghan Acquire New Wardrobe for Return to UK
MONTECITO — Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have purchased an entirely new wardrobe in preparation for their anticipated return to...
