Disney launches new Colin Kaepernick ride consisting of 60 minutes of sitting on the bench 
Tom Hanks has ‘no respect’ for people not wearing face masks while trafficking children 
Merriam-Webster removes words with ‘black’ in them from dictionary for their ties to slavery 
Disney announces their newest princess: Colin Kaepernick 
POLL: How should Disney rename irredeemably racist Snow White? Featured
BREAKING: Planned Parenthood pledges 1 dollar to Black Lives Matter for every POC aborted
Sometimes a man can be confronted by stunning bravery. Other times he finds himself at odds with the bravely stunning. In this case, I very...
Local ladies attend ‘Worst clam rally in history’
WALKER, LA — Three local woman prepared their finest clam dishes in preparation for their first clam rally. Three hours into the event, the ladies...
Newsom reminds Californians to only go outside to defecate on the sidewalk
In a stern warning amid the raging COVID-19 pandemic, Governor Gavin Newsom issued a reminder for Californians only to go outside in order to defecate...
Amid COVID pandemic, nation’s hospitals request fewer ventilators and more cowbell
Nurse crews are absolutely killing it in their response to a Tik Tok dance challenge during the COVID-19 pandemic. The craze is spreading across the...
Breaking: New Orleans Coronavirus outbreak caused by Popeye’s new fried bat combo
Upping the ante in the Chicken flame wars, Popeye’s released their boldest meal to date. Playing off of the Corona Virus pandemic—that started in a...
Newsbeat
Seattle bullies knock down little kids’ fort, take all their soy milk
Mayor Lightfoot assures us all 300 killed this year in Chicago will be able to vote by mail in November
Entertainment
Disney launches new Colin Kaepernick ride consisting of 60 minutes of sitting on the bench
Tom Hanks has ‘no respect’ for people not wearing face masks while trafficking children
Tech Grid
Klingon Lives Matter activists feel they’re being ignored after the death of Worf
Klingon Lives Matter feel as if their movement is being overshadowed by Black Lives Matter and ignored after the death of beloved Worf. "We're basically...
Facebook launches satire filter to protect people from unapproved laughing
Mountain View, CA—Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced today that Facebook is launching a mandatory satire filter that will strip all the joy away from the...
VIDEO: Bill Gates opens up about plan to depopulate and control the world
In this candid interview, Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft and the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation for Sinister Bioengineering opens up about his plan to...
Google launches satire filter to protect people from unapproved laughing
Mountain View, CA—Google CEO Sundar Pichai announced today that a the next Google Chrome update will include a mandatory satire filter that will strip all...
Alyssa Milano releases line of crocheted body armor for police
Actress, activists, and self proclaimed genius Alyssa Milano has already made her mark by being part of the #MetooSometimes Movement and, of course, entertainment. Her...
New border wall now totally impermeable to everything except 2×6″ bricks of every drug known to man
Is it just me or does that wall seem like it's full of holes? Not just a few here and there. I mean like hundreds...