Fauci now recommends face masks over your eyes so you can’t read his leaked emails
WASHINGTON, DC—A treasure trove of emails from National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (NIAID) Director Dr. Anthony Fauci’s were...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Senate Narrowly Avoids Doing Anything Productive Before August Recess
WASHINGTON — The United States Senate on Friday successfully averted a late-session outbreak of legislative productivity, clearing the way for...
WNBA Fans Quietly Optimistic About Biological Men Joining League, Citing Hope for Watchable Basketball
A growing number of WNBA supporters have begun expressing cautious enthusiasm for the prospect of biological males competing in the...
It’s Last Chance for Iran Day…Again
WASHINGTON — Diplomats and officials confirmed this week that the United States and its partners have once more reached the...
Khan promises to ban knives ‘harder’ after latest London knife attack
London Mayor Sadiq Khan has promised to ban knives harder after the latest terrorist knife attack in London. "Killing people...
BREAKING: Arsonist blames climate change for making him start the Spokane fire
SPOKANE, Wash. — A 37-year-old man charged with starting a wildfire near Spokane told investigators that climate change induced a...
BREAKING: Sen Mitch McConnell has tragically died tomorrow
WASHINGTON — Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) died tomorrow afternoon at approximately 3:17 p.m. Eastern Time, according to a statement released...
WNBA to start all games with Caitlin Clark receiving 5 fouls for getting punched in the face
INDIANAPOLIS — The WNBA has instructed referees to facilitate a formal lineup of opposing players who will punch Caitlin Clark...
Rep. Ocasio-Cortez Invents Groundbreaking Car That Runs on Neither Gas Nor Electricity
WASHINGTON — Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez announced Thursday the development of a new mode of personal transportation designed to eliminate reliance...
Branch Covidians Hold Solemn Candlelight Vigil After Fauci Invokes 5th Amendment on Everything
WASHINGTON — Dozens of masked adherents of the Branch Covidians gathered on the National Mall Tuesday evening for a candlelight...
