Justin Trudeau banned from Russia; can’t return new babushka

GENESIUS TIMES

MOSCOW—Russian officials banned Justin Trudeau from entry to the country, cancelling an upcoming meeting scheduled months ago. The Prime Minister is reportedly devastated he now has no where to wear his new babushka and cannot to return it to the store.

“I spent hours picking out the perfect babushka for my visit and now it’s past the return date on my receipt,” Mr. Trudeau told reporters. “I am now exploring military involvement.”

Because of the Castro family and Russian government’s historically close ties, Justin’s ban has come as a shock to Canadian diplomats. Though Russian officials have not explained the ban, analysts believe it is part of Russia’s notorious homophobic agenda.

“Insulting my wardrobe is an insult to my power,” the Prime Minister said while browsing Amazon for rice hats. “I’ll know what to do after my meeting with the Chinese.”

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