Local Chinese restaurant replaces fortune cookie sayings with Fani’s Daddy’s genius

ATLANTA—A Chinese restaurant has bid farewell to tradition and ushered in a new era of enlightenment with its latest culinary innovation: “Fani’s Daddy’s Quips.”

Gone are the days of bland fortune cookie fortunes predicting vague futures; instead, patrons of this establishment can now expect to receive pearls of wisdom straight from the mouth of Fani’s daddy, John Floyd, as witnessed during recent courtroom proceedings.

Restaurant owner Mylong Dong, inspired by the profound insights shared by Fani’s father, saw an opportunity to elevate the dining experience for his customers. “When I saw Fani’s daddy speaking, I knew we had to incorporate his wisdom into our restaurant,” Dong explained. “Fortune cookies are so last century. It’s time for a new tradition.”

Among the quips now adorning the slips of paper previously nestled inside fortune cookies are such gems as:

  • “Oldest daughter always have $200 in cash when on date or she will see terrible fate.”
  • “A daughter without 3 safes will live life as waif.”
  • “Honorable Wade got paid – Oldest daughter got laid – Poor Atlantans got played.”
  • “Let me just say it’s a black thing. You just can’t handle the vibe we bring.”

The response from customers has been overwhelmingly positive, with many praising the restaurant for its innovative approach to fortune-telling. “I used to come here just for the food, but now I come for the wisdom too,” remarked longtime diner Harold Wang. “Fani’s daddy knows what he talking about.”

However, Dong admits that his newfound venture into fortune-telling is not without its challenges. “Unfortunately, we only have three sayings at the moment,” he lamented. “But I’m eagerly awaiting the next scandal so that Fani’s dad can testify and bless us with more pearls of wisdom.”

As patrons eagerly await their next dining experience, one thing is certain: Fani’s Daddy’s Quips are here to stay, providing both sustenance for the body and food for thought for the soul.


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