New ‘Santifa’ cards include explosives instead of glitter

Looking for a clever way to celebrate the holidays in 2021? Look no further!

The new Santifa cards come with small explosives to that you can burn down your loved ones’ homes, just like Antifa does everywhere else!

Glitter or confetti in a card? Those are so 2020!

“I never know what to give my relatives for the holidays,” 35-year-old Jimmy Onenut, who lives in his parents’ basement said. “The Santifa cards with explosives seems perfect!”

If you think Antifa is done burning stuff down, just you wait until they start overturning elections in the swing states due to all the fraud! People will be clamoring for these cards, so get them while they’re hot!

Get into an argument with your productive conservative family members at your Thanksgiving Zoom? Send them a Santifa card!

If you want to really annoy your loved ones, try the new Santifa cards!

Originally published December 5, 2020

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