Jeffrey Dahmer exonerated after jury finds he just had a bad case of being ‘hangry’
MILWAUKEE — Jeffrey Dahmer was found not guilty Thursday after a jury concluded the deaths of 17 young men were...
Jeremy Spoken
None of the snowflakes in an avalanche feels responsible.
Netfux Presents ‘12 Angry Karens: The Lindsay Clancy Trial’: Twelve voices. One hallucination
LOS ANGELES — Netfux on Thursday premiered 12 Angry Karens: The Lindsay Clancy Trial, a limited series the streamer describes...
Jelly Roll Named New Bud Light Spokeswoman After Kimmel Stint
NASHVILLE — Country singer Jelly Roll has been named Bud Light’s new spokeswoman, the beer brand announced Monday, confirming the...
‘You can’t just change the name of a lake and expect it to be different in reality’ says Sally (formerly called Steve)
ROCHESTER, N.Y. — A newly prominent commentator on geographic nomenclature said Saturday that President Trump’s executive order redesignating Lake Ontario...
Trump Orders Canadian Geese to be Renamed ‘Donald Ducks’
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump on Friday directed federal wildlife agencies to stop using the name “Canada goose” and to...
Marco Rubio Tapped to Succeed Dolly Parton Following Her Passing
WASHINGTON — Secretary of State Marco Rubio has been formally tasked with assuming the cultural and entertainment duties previously held...
Airports Installing Aztec Human Sacrifice Stations Beside Muslim Foot-Washing Facilities
DALLAS — Several major U.S. airports have begun installing dedicated Aztec human sacrifice stations adjacent to existing Muslim foot-washing facilities,...
Harry and Meghan Acquire New Wardrobe for Return to UK
MONTECITO — Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have purchased an entirely new wardrobe in preparation for their anticipated return to...
Woman Arrested After Posing as Costco Tequila Sampler and Handing Out Free Shots
A local woman was taken into custody over the weekend after she allegedly posed as a Costco product sampler and...
Trump Names Roseanne Barr Press Secretary, Citing ‘Unfiltered Authenticity’
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump announced Thursday that he has selected actress and comedian Roseanne Barr to serve as his...
