Biden Promises That Any Americans Who Die In WWIII Won’t Have To Repay Their Student Loans
WASHINGTON, DC—In a move that combines the solemnity of war with the relief of student debt, President Joe Biden has...
Year: 2024
Mark Cuban ends discriminatory hiring at Dallas Mavericks; signs 4’3″ powerhouse Wei Wu as Center
DALLAS—In a groundbreaking move towards diversity and inclusion, Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban has declared war on discriminatory hiring practices...
KC Chiefs change name to KC Swifts, promise more airtime to new mascot
In a surprising move that combines sports, pop culture, and an apparent disdain for controversial mascots, the Kansas City Swifts...
BREAKING: Speaker Mike Johnson prepared to complain ‘much more’ on social media if Biden doesn’t do something about the border
In a stunning display of legislative brinkmanship, Speaker of the House Mike Johnson has issued a formidable warning to the...
Alarming 35% of migrants come out as Trans after spending one day in NYC public school
NEW YORK—In a startling turn of events that has left educators bewildered, a recent study has revealed that a whopping...
AOC: ‘If we just legalize illegal immigration, there wouldn’t be any illegal immigration’
In the ongoing dialogue surrounding immigration reform, it's time we consider unconventional approaches that challenge the status quo. My recent...
BREAKING: Boeing 737 Plane Exempted From Safety Regulations After Coming Out As Black And Gay
In a groundbreaking revelation that has left the aviation industry buzzing, a Boeing 737 plane has bravely come out as...
Defense Secretary Austin receives 50 more commendations and ribbons for being out sick last week
In a stunning display of valor and resilience, Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin has added a staggering 50 new commendations and...
‘I was fired for being black’ complains woman who was hired for being black
HARVARD—In a tale that defies the very essence of logic and leaves the world scratching its collective head, Claudine Gay...
Jimmy Kimmel denies getting moob surgery on Epstein Island
HOLLYWOOD—In the latest episode of the surreal sitcom that is Jimmy Kimmel's life, the late-night funnyman finds himself at the...
