WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking turn of events, President Joe Biden has announced that he will be personally hanging six Easter Bunnies in honor of Trans Visibility Day. The decision, which was made without consulting any experts in the field, has left both animal rights activists and the general public horrified and confused.

“I just thought it would be a nice gesture,” Biden was overheard saying in a White House meeting. “We’re celebrating Trans Visibility Day, and what better way to do that than by hanging some cute, fluffy bunnies? That’s what the trans folks like to do, right?”

The president’s plan has already sparked controversy among animal rights groups, who argue that forcing rabbits to participate in a holiday event is inhumane and unnecessary.

“We cannot condone the use of live animals for entertainment purposes,” said PETA spokesperson Emily Smith. “President Biden should reconsider his decision and find a more compassionate way to celebrate Trans Visibility Day.”

Despite the backlash, Biden remains committed to his unusual Easter Bunny initiative, insisting that it is a necessary step towards inclusivity and equality.

“I’m just trying to make the world a little better for everyone,” the president said. “If that means hanging some bunnies, then so be it.”

In a recent statement, the White House clarified that the six Easter Bunnies will be provided by a local farm, ensuring that they are well-cared for and humanely treated before their untimely demise. Additionally, the president has encouraged private businesses to follow suit and incorporate animal-friendly elements into their own Easter celebrations.

“We hope that by including these lovely creatures in our festivities, we can bring people of all backgrounds and beliefs together in celebration,” said White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki. “After all, isn’t that what the Easter Bunny is all about?”

As the nation continues to grapple with the president’s bizarre decision, many are left wondering if this is just another example of Biden’s penchant for unconventional policy-making. For now, it seems that we can all take a moment to reflect on the true meaning of Trans Visibility Day and the sacrifices that must be made in the name of progress.

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Exavier Saskagoochie

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