I have been reliably informed that we now know the name of the last person to visit Jeffrey Epstein before his untimely death. Bellary Clanton is his name. Clanton claimed to be a distant relative of Epstein’s and said he is “shocked and distraught over news of his suicide.”

Clanton, not to be confused with Clinton, I mean who would even think that in the first place, grew up with Epstein. They played in their own hand built treehouse, and laid under the stars telling stories to each other about what they would do when they grew up.

Clanton never imagined this would be the course of events. Sadly neither did I.

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Earnest O'Connor

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