BREAKING: Women with big hairy balls continue to dominate women without big hairy balls in sports

GENESIUS TIMES

ATLANTA—Lia Thomas has become the first transgender athlete to win a National Collegiate Athletic Association swimming championship – but she wasn’t completely happy following the dominating performance.

The UPenn swimmer, 22, won the 500 yard freestyle in Atlanta in a time of 4 minutes, 33.24 seconds on Thursday evening. 

“Yeah, I basically dominated, but I would have done much better if this stupid swimsuit didn’t crush my ladyballs.” Thomas said in an exclusive post-win interview with Genesius Times.

The crowd was also not impressed with the uniform issue, cheering for the woman who’d come second place – Emma Weyant, of the University of Virginia. She swam 4:34.99. 

While Thomas was given some cheers, boos could also be heard ringing out throughout the spectator stands, clearly directed to the uncomfortable uniform.  

“They really need to design women’s swimsuits for women with big hairy balls,” Thomas added. “This is ridiculous!”

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