Harvard Hires Stormy Daniels to Teach Class on Virtue

BOSTON—Harvard University has announced the hiring of adult film star Stormy Daniels to teach a class on virtue. The decision comes on the heels of the university’s controversial appointment of Claudine Gay to teach ethics, despite her own questionable past.

According to Harvard President Ray Cist, the university is committed to diversity and equity, and Stormy Daniels’ unique life experience makes her the perfect candidate to lead the class on virtue. “If Brian Stelter can teach journalism at Harvard, we figured, why not?” Cist said in a statement.

When asked about the backlash surrounding Claudine Gay’s appointment, Cist shrugged it off, saying, “A little plagiarism never hurt anyone. And besides, who better to teach ethics than someone who’s had to navigate the gray areas themselves?”

The hiring of Stormy Daniels has sparked a heated debate about the definition of virtue and whether someone with her, ahem, “experience” is qualified to teach on the subject. However, Cist remains undeterred, insisting that Daniels’ perspective will provide a “deep” learning experience for students.

“We’re not just talking about theoretical virtue here,” Cist explained. “We’re talking about real-world applications. And who better to teach that than someone who’s had to navigate the complexities of virtue in their own life?”

When asked about the potential backlash from parents and alumni, Cist waved it off, saying, “We’re Harvard. We’re supposed to push boundaries. And if that means hiring a porn star to teach virtue, then so be it.”

In related news, the university has announced plans to expand its curriculum to include courses on “The Art of the Deal” taught by Donald Trump, “Effective Communication” led by Kanye West, and “Conflict Resolution” instructed by Vladimir Putin.

As one Harvard student quipped, “I guess the only thing we can be certain of is that our tuition dollars are being well-spent.”


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