POLL: 100% of abortion supporters have already been born

A recent poll has found that 100 percent of Americans who support abortion have already been born.

“Every single person who supports abortion has been born themselves,” pollster Frank Sputz said. “We didn’t find one aborted respondent who supported abortion.”

Respondant’s reasoning is varied.

“I support the woman’s right to choose abortion because what if that child is poor and unwanted, then life would be very difficult and suffer.”

Another high percentage of abortion supporters claim that they’ve had a difficult life but would not like to be post-natally aborted.

“Yeah I mean my life was awful but you can’t just kill me. That wouldn’t be cool,” abortion supporter Rodg Michaels of Detroit said.

“I support a woman’s right to choose because fetuses can’t really speak for themselves,” Michaels added.