BREAKING: Kamala Harris promises to do ‘everything Trump would do’ as president but with ‘more cackling’
Washington, D.C. – Vice President Kamala Harris has been accused of outright lifting former President Donald Trump’s policy ideas—from the “no tax on tips” idea to the border wall—and presenting them as innovative solutions for America with the added benefit of her trademark cackle.
The controversy began when Harris unveiled her latest policy proposals, which included a “No Tax on Tips” initiative, a massive border wall project, and a tough stance on China—ideas that closely mirror Trump’s 2016 campaign promises. However, Harris insists her versions come with a “unique Kamala twist.”
“Build that wall?” Harris declared with a wide grin during a rally in Phoenix, Arizona. “Absolutely! But this time, it’s going to be the ‘People’s Wall of Unity.’ Same wall, just with better branding and, of course, it’ll be painted in all the colors of the rainbow to reflect America’s diversity!” She paused for effect before unleashing a cackle that echoed through the arena. “And yes, Mexico will still pay for it—only now, we’ll call it a solidarity tax!”
Harris also jumped on Trump’s “No Tax on Tips” bandwagon, rebranding it as “No Tax on Tips—But with a Smile!” In her version, the IRS will ensure that tipped workers keep more of their hard-earned cash, just as Trump proposed, but with Harris personally promising to “smile through the entire implementation process.”
“We’re keeping Trump’s tax breaks,” Harris explained, “but with a twist—I’ll be the one personally overseeing that every worker gets to keep their tips, and I’ll be adding a cackle or two to make sure it’s done right. After all, what’s better than getting your money back with a laugh?”
Political analysts quickly noticed the uncanny similarities between Harris’s platform and Trump’s, but with minor cosmetic changes. Harris’s “America First” agenda has been rebranded as “America First—But Make It Fun,” with a focus on laughing through the tough decisions.
“Take Trump’s tariffs on China,” Harris continued. “I’m going to keep those tariffs, but every time we impose one, I’ll personally tweet a gif of me cackling at Xi Jinping. It’s about showing strength, but also that we can have fun while doing it!”
Even her approach to foreign relations bears Trump’s unmistakable influence. Harris announced plans to negotiate peace deals in the Middle East by using Trump’s exact blueprint, but promised to giggle through the entire process. “Laughter is the best diplomacy,” Harris quipped. “I’ll just laugh until they agree to peace. It’s foolproof!”
When pressed about the blatant similarities between her policies and Trump’s, Harris brushed off the concerns with a wave of her hand. “Look, it’s not stealing if you do it with style,” she said, followed by another round of her trademark laugh. “Plus, I’m adding my own personal touch. For example, I’ll be revamping Trump’s Space Force by renaming it the ‘Space Force of Love and Light.’ Same mission, but with better vibes.”
Despite the obvious parallels, Harris’s supporters have rallied behind her, praising her for being bold enough to “recycle” Trump’s ideas while adding her own flair. “Kamala is just showing that good ideas transcend party lines,” said one enthusiastic supporter. “And let’s be honest, who doesn’t love a good cackle?”
Meanwhile, Trump himself has responded to the accusations with a mixture of amusement and outrage. “It’s a total disgrace, folks,” Trump said in a statement. “She’s taking my ideas, my policies, and just laughing her way through them. But let’s face it—nobody can do Trump like Trump.”
As Harris continues to roll out her Trump-inspired agenda, she remains unfazed by the criticism. “Why reinvent the wheel when you can just borrow it, slap some shiny rims on it, and laugh all the way to the White House?” Harris said with a wink. “And remember, it’s not about who had the idea first—it’s about who can cackle the loudest while claiming it!”