Pride parade cancelled due to 90% chance of fire and brimstone

A pride parade scheduled to be held on Saturday in the twin cities of Sodom and Gomorrah has been cancelled due to inclement weather. Meteorologists are predicting a 90 percent chance of fire and brimstone falling from the sky around noon.

“It’s unfortunate,” parade organizer Jerry Sizzlechest said, “but it’s the weather. What are you gonna do?”

Residents of the entire metropolitan area have been warned to stay indoors during the storm as it appears to be apocalyptic in nature.

“We’re going to have a party!” one resident sang in defiance of Mother Nature. “We got some bubble gum flavored vodka and we’re going to drink and have a dance party baby!”

Mayor Harry Bera of Sodom has promised that they will reschedule the parade after the storm.

“We shall not let a little fire and brimstone stop this pride!” he said laughing.

Originally published June 6, 2019


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