PORTLAND—Several liberal cities across the United States have begun boarding up stores in preparation for the massive “joy” from Democrats in the case of a Trump victory in today’s presidential election. The unprecedented move, which has been met with both confusion and criticism, is aimed at preventing any potential property damage or unrest that may result from the outpouring of leftover joy from Democrats. 

“We’ve seen the chaos that can ensue when people are too happy,” said one city official in Portland, Oregon. “We want to make sure that our city is prepared for any eventuality.” 

The decision to board up stores has raised eyebrows among some residents, who question the logic behind the move. “I don’t understand why they’re doing this,” said one local business owner in Seattle, Washington. “If Trump wins, Democrats will be too busy celebrating to even think about causing any trouble.” 

In response to the criticism, city officials have defended their decision, arguing that the boarding up of stores is a necessary precaution to ensure public safety. “We have a responsibility to protect our citizens and their property,” said one official in San Francisco, California. “And if that means boarding up a few stores to prevent any potential damage, then that’s what we’ll do.” 

The move has also sparked a debate on social media, with some users arguing that the boarding up of stores is a sign of fear and weakness on the part of liberal cities. “They’re afraid of what might happen if Trump wins,” said one user on Twitter. “It’s pathetic.” 

As the election approaches, the question remains: will the boarding up of stores in liberal cities be enough to contain the massive “joy” that is expected to sweep the nation in case of a Trump victory? Only time will tell.

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