American Fetuses identify as Ukrainians so that Democrats recognize their right to life

As many Democratic dominated state legislatures across the country push for extreme abortion deregulation including bills that would allow for infanticide, innocent human fetuses are fighting back, identifying as the sacred cow of liberal politics: Ukraine.

There are now over 1 million American fetuses who have renounced their citizenship and become Ukrainian citizens in order for Democrats to recognize their right to life.

Billy Jones, a gestating fetus in an Albany, New York mom said that he feels offended that Democratic legislators don’t acknowledge his right to life. “What these people don’t realize is that I’m a Ukrainian who is being oppressed by Vladimir Putin. Please save me!”

It’s working too. President* Joe Biden said in a statement, “I’m sending a $14 billion aid package to the Ukrainian fetuses immediately. We must save the Ukrainian fetuses from certain death.”

Texas Democrats, who recently opposed the Heartbeat Bill said that only fetuses with heartbeats that beat for Ukraine should be saved.

“Everyone deserves the right to life, as long as they are being attacked by Putin. Putin is literally Hitler,” Beto O’Rourke said at a campaign stop in Dallas.

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