BREAKING: Monkeypox outbreak traced back to several ‘White Dudes For Harris’ rallies
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a shocking development, health officials have traced the recent surge in monkeypox cases to a series...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Democrats seek to expel Rep. Anna Paulina Luna from Congress for being an actual woman
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats across the nation have expressed outrage after a video surfaced of Rep. Anna Paulina Luna (R-FL)...
BREAKING: Following declining poll numbers for Kamala Harris, the WHO declares a global emergency over the monkeypox virus
NEW YORK—Following a sharp decline in Vice President Kamala Harris’s poll numbers, the World Health Organization (WHO) has declared a...
Kamala Harris asks voters to put her in office so she can do all the things she didn’t do while she’s been in office
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a bold and refreshingly honest campaign speech, Vice President Kamala Harris has officially asked voters to...
BREAKING: 1.3 billion people attend Kamala Harris rally in Fauxitawnee, Pennsylvania
FAUXITAWNEE, PA — In what can only be described as the most monumental event in human history, a staggering 1.3...
FACT CHECK: Yes, Tim Walz did receive a medal of valor as the first person to land on the moon in 1969
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a shocking revelation that has left historians scrambling to revise their textbooks, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz...
BREAKING: Biden/Harris stop taking credit for economy as stock market crashes
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a stunning reversal of their usual rhetoric, President Joe Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris have...
First biological cheetah who identifies as a man set to take gold for Lichtenstein at the Paris Olympics
LICHTENSTEIN—The citizens of this small alpine country in the middle of Europe are abuzz as they are set to take...
Thomas Matthew Crooks headlines ‘White Dudes for Harris’ Zoom call from his room in Hell
US—Thomas Matthew Crooks, the man accused of attempting to assassinate former President Donald Trump, has found an unlikely second career...
BREAKING: 100,000 brave ‘Cucks for Kamala’ donate their testicles to the Harris campaign
US—Not to be outdone by the Karens for Kamala, 100,000 self-proclaimed "Cucks for Kamala" (also known as the "White Dudes...
