Biden urges Ukranians to prepare for Russian invasion by ‘getting vaccinated now’

WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden has released a public service announcement telling Ukrainians to prepare for invasion by the Russians by wearing masks and “getting vaccinated now.”

“The best way to prepare for being blown up in a fiery missile strike by invading Russians is to wear your mask and get vaccinated,” Biden said at a press conference. “If you’re already vaccinated, get another booster. It’s time.”

Biden said that this is just the standard protocol for invasion.

“A vital part of preparing for invasion season is to get vaccinated now,” Biden.

The Biden administration has withdrawn its mandate for private employers to mandate vaccination for employees, but that hasn’t stopped him from urging people everywhere to take the shot.

“You do not want to be in a position where a tank is literally rolling over your house and then you say, holy cow, I’m not fully vaccinated. Your death will be counted as a COVID death. One hundred percent,” Biden said.

close

"Excuse me, has this joke been fact-checked?"

Bypass Zuck and his minions and receive hilarious "unauthorized" satire to your inbox, every day.

We don’t spam! Read our privacy policy for more info.