BREAKING: Amy Barrett caught sneaking into Supreme Court, eating cereal
WASHINGTON DC—Amy Coney Barrett is up to her ‘high jinx’ again. Caught sneaking into the Supreme Court room by the janitor, Jerome Sanders, he snapped this quick pick of her goofing off by eating her breakfast cereal at the bench.
Says Jerome, “I was dustin’ in the anteroom and, darndest thing, I heard this crunchin’… really, kinda spooked me a bit cause no ones supposed to be in the court room. Especially that early. I opened the door pretty slowly cause I don’t know what was goin’ ta see and then I saw her in there chowin’ down. I told her she wasn’t s’posed to be in there but she was pretty insistent. She done warned me that I was almost in contempt of court even just talkin’ to her but then she told me all about her bein’ picked by the President hisself… and how lucky she was and all.
“We showed each other pictures of our family and then, the darndest thing. She asks me over fer dinner and me and Eileen went over to her house and had filet minion with asparagus and crème brulee for dessert that she done made herself.
“Anyways, I hope Congress just ain’t too hard on that woman cause when Judge Kavanaugh got approved and he showed up for work, he would sit in his office and cry and cry for days on end… but I told him, sir, Congress was just bein’ what they is and no more or no less.”