BREAKING: Biden officially changes his name to Cho Bei Den
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WASHINGTON DC—Feeling that the election is behind him, Joe Biden has sold the naming rights to the president of the United States and Self-identifying President-Elect Joe Biden has officially changed his name to Cho Bei Den.
The deal was organized by Bei Den’s pick for the Food & Drug Administration and his son Hunter Biden, who will keep his name.
“I thought it might be a little confusing if I changed my name before the election, so I waited to do it until after, you know the thing,” Bei Den said.
Part of the naming rights is a designation for “10 percent to the Big Guy.”
“This is such an amazing multi-cultural miracle by the president-elect,” CNN anchor Don Lemon reported. “Finally we have a president who is willing to sell his name to the Chinese.”
Some Bei Den voters were skeptical of the move.
“I don’t think I would’ve voted for him I knew he was going to sell his name like that. It just ain’t right,” Billie Meeks of Philadelphia said.
*No cultures were appropriated in the writing of this article.