BREAKING: Biden officially changes his name to Cho Bei Den
WASHINGTON DC—Feeling that the election is behind him, Joe Biden has sold the naming rights to the president of the United States and Self-identifying President-Elect Joe Biden has officially changed his name to Cho Bei Den.
The deal was organized by Bei Den’s pick for the Food & Drug Administration and his son Hunter Biden, who will keep his name.
“I thought it might be a little confusing if I changed my name before the election, so I waited to do it until after, you know the thing,” Bei Den said.
Part of the naming rights is a designation for “10 percent to the Big Guy.”
“This is such an amazing multi-cultural miracle by the president-elect,” CNN anchor Don Lemon reported. “Finally we have a president who is willing to sell his name to the Chinese.”
Some Bei Den voters were skeptical of the move.
“I don’t think I would’ve voted for him I knew he was going to sell his name like that. It just ain’t right,” Billie Meeks of Philadelphia said.
*No cultures were appropriated in the writing of this article.