BREAKING: Congress asks protesters to obey the law so Congress can get back to breaking the law

WASHINGTON, DC—Members of Congress have pleaded with the protesters at the US Capitol to obey the rule of law so that they can get back to breaking the rule of law.

The announcement came after protesters stormed the Capitol building.

“We are a nation of laws,” Senator Tom Cotton said. “This protest needs to end now so that we can get back to certifying an illegal presidential vote!”

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, who was found at the Capitol bar, demanded that everyone stop breaking the law so that the Congress can get back to breaking the law.

“Don’t you know that the only people allowed to break the law are the government officials like me?” Pelosi slurred through.

CNN has confirmed that protesting is bad again.


"Excuse me, has this joke been fact-checked?"

Bypass Zuck and his minions and receive hilarious "unauthorized" satire to your inbox, every day.

We don’t spam! Read our privacy policy for more info.