HEAVEN—Heavenly sources confirmed that the city of Portland is in mortal danger. If G-D cannot find ten righteous people in the city, He will burn the entire city to the ground.

“Portland has devolved into a cesspool of immorality and depravity, the likes of which have not been seen since the days of Sodom and Gomorrah,” a Heavenly source said. “The residents of Portland have deliberately disobeyed the word of G-D time and again, and for this they deserve to be destroyed. If G-D finds ten righteous people in the city He will spare it from destruction; if not, He will burn the entire city to the ground.”

Conservative pastors prayed for Portland to be spared, but G-D did not find even one righteous man in the city. A Heavenly source confirmed that Portland will be destroyed by climate change.

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Rafi Metz

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