BREAKING: IRS changes its name to the IRSS
WASHINGTON, DC—To better align with the new fascist tyranny in charge of the US government, the Internal Revenue System (IRS) is changing its name to the IRSS and will install people with slightly Nazi names in positions of power to really intimidate you.
Following the raid of a Florida business last week with guns and full tactical gear, IRS (Internal Revenue Service) has officially announced that they are changing their name to the IRSS (Internal Revenue Schutzstaffel). Yes, you read that right – the tax-collecting agency is adding “Schutzstaffel” to their title, just in case you didn’t feel paranoid enough about your taxes already!
According to a spokesperson for the agency, the decision to add “Schutzstaffel” to their name was inspired by their commitment to make it clear that they are a fascist organization. Because apparently, regular tax audits and meticulous scrutiny of financial records were just not cutting it anymore. Now, the IRSS wants to make it crystal clear that they are watching your every move, from the moment you wake up to the moment you lay your head on your pillow (which, by the way, they’ll be checking to see if it’s a deductible expense).
The agency claims that the addition of “Schutzstaffel” is in the spirit of transparency, but we can’t help but wonder if they’re just trying to make us feel like we’re living in some Orwellian nightmare. “We want taxpayers to know that we’re always watching, even when they think they’re in the clear,” said the spokesperson with a sinister smile that would make any supervillain proud.
In addition to the name change, the IRSS has also unveiled their plans for new and improved surveillance methods. From drone flyovers of your property to tracking your social media activity, they’ve got it all covered. Forget about privacy; it’s tax season, and Big Brother is ready to scrutinize every aspect of your life.
In response to the name change, taxpayers across the nation have expressed their exasperation and bewilderment. “I thought the IRS was already watching us like a hawk,” said one taxpayer. “Now, they’re adding ‘Schutzstaffel’.”
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