US—Democrats struggling to shake the “light on crime” stigma have passed a sweeping crime reform bill. The new bill, which passed the lame-duck House 221-181 requiring that home invaders announce their intention to rob people in order to avoid jail time.

• The home invaders must announce they are burglars with the intent to rob from the household.
• The new law also requires then to wear black jackets with white lettering that says CRIMINALS on the back to avoid confusion when police come and prevent friendly fire.
• Lastly it is a requirement that before their home invasion they are fully vaccinated and if positive for Covid-19 they need to postpone the home invasion for three weeks or wear a NK95 face mask.

If burglars follow these rules, they are able to take whatever they want from any house with impunity.

Failure to comply with each requirement will result in a 30 days sentence for each violation.

Pelosi hopes that this law will leave a legacy of tough on crime by eliminating much of the crime in the nation by making crime legal.

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Jeremy Spoken

None of the snowflakes in an avalanche feels responsible.

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