SEATTLE—Tech founder and worldwide supervillain Bill Gates says that he will release the deadliest disease known to man—smallpox—if people don’t get vaccinated for COVID-19. The threat comes at a time when many are rejecting the mandates for vaccination, resting hope on other treatments.
“We probably should have made COVID-19 deadlier to begin with,” Gates admitted about his first biological weapon. “We could have made it kill young children instead of old people with diabetes. But we didn’t, so we really did you plebes a favor this time. But if you reject our dictates to get vaccinated, we will be forced to release a deadlier disease to get you to comply, probably smallpox.”
Gates left the boards of Microsoft and Berkshire Hathaway earlier this year to focus completely on developing biological weapons to kill innocent people, but some aren’t so sure.
“I don’t think he’s got it in him to release smallpox,” Smitty Smithson of Grand Rapids, Michigan said. “I mean unless he just steals it from a real evil genius. He’s more like an evil side kick that quite frankly doesn’t have the mental power to create something really devastating.”
Gates also admitted that he didn’t see ivermectin coming.
“My people assured me that there was no effective treatment to my bioweapon and that people would be begging for the vaccine. Those people have been fired and sent to a New York nursing home,” Gates said.
Joe Biden’s Ministry of Truth said they would be censoring any information about Gates’s new pandemic.