BALLSCOLD, MN—Canadian and Mexican truckers entering the US through their respective borders are now identifying as illegal immigrants to sidestep the Biden administration vaccine mandate.

The Department of Homeland Security is now require all non-U.S. individuals entering the country via land ports of entry and ferry terminals to be fully vaccinated for COVID-19, with the obvious exception of illegal immigrants because, as the White House Press Secretary stated, “they’re not planning on staying here.”

According to the DHS, vaccines are being required as COVID-19 cases continue to rise across the country among vaccinated individuals. This mandate applies to all non-U.S. individuals, traveling for both essential and non-essential reasons.

“I’m not planning on getting a shot that could hurt me and doesn’t do what it’s supposed to do,” said Canadian trucker Jimmy Jones said. “So, I just told the guys at the gate I’m an illegal immigrant and this is a moving van. They were totally cool with that.”

Beginning January 22, 2022, upon arriving at the border, travelers must verbally attest to their COVID-19 vaccination status, provide proof of a CDC-approved vaccination, present either a passport or some other proof that you’ve sworn allegiance to the Deep State Death Cult.

COVID-19 testing will not be required for entry at land ports of entry or ferry terminals.

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