KIEV—Ukraine has honored the US Democratic presidential nominee with an official Joe Biden coin in support of the candidate through this trying election.

“I’m very honored to be honored with such an honor,” Biden said at a press conference, noticeably sweating. “But it should be noted that this doesn’t mean that I had anything shady going on with the country.”

Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelensky had a different take.

“We are glad to reward our dear friend Joe Biden with this in exchange for everything he did for us while Vice President and even more when he becomes President of the United States.”

The inscription on the coin says, “Thanks A BILLION Love Burisma!” in Ukrainian.

Biden bragged about withholding US foreign aid from Ukraine until the Ukraine fired an investigator looking into his son’s $50,000 gas executive position in the country despite not having any experience in the industry.

Zelensky said that crates of the solid gold Biden coins were being shipped to Biden’s house in Washington DC in gratitude for “favors”. It’s unclear if this constitutes a quid pro quo.

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Exavier Saskagoochie

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