BREAKING: Chiefs Sign P. Diddy to replace problematic kicker Harrison Butker
In an unprecedented move that has left the NFL world buzzing, the Kansas City Chiefs have announced that they have...
Month: May 2024
Republicans Embarrassed Again As MTG Wins ‘Biggest Set of Balls’ Award
In a stunning upset that left many Republicans red-faced and embarrassed, firebrand Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene has emerged victorious in...
BREAKING: NFL Suspends Chiefs’ Kicker for Not Meeting League Minimum for Domestic Violence
The NFL has officially suspended Kansas City Chiefs' kicker, Harrison Butker, for his failure to meet the league minimum of...
STUNNING: Chet and Jabba the Hutt cover SI 2022 swimsuit issue
US—Chet and Jabba the Hutt have reached new career peaks: Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue cover star. "It's hard to even...
BREAKING: Biden challenges Trump to a diaper-filling contest
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has challenged former President Donald Trump to a diaper-filling contest, igniting a fierce battle between the...
Inadequate Judge Merchan can’t gag Stormy Daniels: ‘I’ve Tried’
In a shocking turn of events, notoriously small jurist, Judge Merchan, has been unable to gag Stormy Daniels, the adult...
Biden draws his largest rally ever in Del Rio, Texas
DEL RIO, TEXAS—Thousands of illegal immigrants, mostly from Haiti, are congregating under an international bridge in the largest rally ever for...
BREAKING: Trump indicted for drawing 100,000 people to rally
WILDWOOD, New Jersey—In a shocking turn of events, former President Donald Trump has been indicted for the heinous crime of...
Kentucky Derby winner declines White House invitation: ‘If I wanted to see a horse’s ass I would’ve come in second’
Brian Hernandez Jr., jockey for the Kentucky Derby winner Mystik Dan, has declined an invitation to the White House, saying,...
Boeing issues apology after accidentally killing 10 NCAA whistleblowers
Boeing has issued a formal apology after "accidentally" killing 10 NCAA referees during a series of test flights. The aerospace...
