No country on earth is more addicted to guns than America. Gun culture in America is strong and vibrant – and it’s also a bit nutty. Who needs to own all of these firearms anyway? Nobody. Here are the top reasons:

• They put the government in check. The government won’t be so quick to trample on the rights of an armed populace, and we just can’t have that – it’s reckless and irresponsible.
• They’re meant to kill. That’s not what a gun is meant for.
• They’re scary-looking. They have all of these scary features and compartments that frighten people, especially Democrats.
• The Founding Fathers only had in mind nerf guns when they wrote the Second Amendment. True story.
• If someone breaks into your house and is about to kill you, you’re better off calling one of those social workers. Violence isn’t the answer.
• Only the government can be trusted with firearms. Because no government in the history of mankind has ever disarmed its populace and then proceed to murder a large chunk of its own citizens.

If you still support individual ownership of firearms even after reading this, you have blood on your hands.

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Rafi Metz

Rafi is the king of satire, a master of his trade. Nobody is immune to his hyperbolic and satirical outrage. Nobody is spared from being the object of his incessant mockery. Because at the end of the day, everyone is a parody of themselves.

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