WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden says he is prepared retaliate for the Ukraine invasion by misgendering Vladimir Putin.

“Our number one priority right now is to make Russia feel the worst pain possible for the atrocities they’re committing,” Biden said in a press conference in the Rose Garden today. “And that means that we will deploy misgendering to the fullest extent we can.”

Misgendering has been described as the worst form of violence possible by several experts.

“We’ve already sent $80 billion in weapons to Ukraine in order to leave for the Russians when they take over. But that’s our backup plan. We fully foresee the misgendering Putin to cause too much pain for them to keep invading stuff,” Biden said.

In response to the threat, Russian President Vladimir Putin invaded the International Space Station.

Biden says that they won’t stop at misgendering Putin and will misgender the entire country of Russia.

“We’re prepared to do the unthinkable,” Biden said.

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