UNITED STATES—By this time you’re probably aware that Trump was acquitted in his second impeachment trial by a vote of 57-43, just 10 votes shy of conviction. The former president was pleased with the results as you would imagine, as were the 75 million Americans who voted for him in this past year’s election.

Not content, however, with winning just two impeachment trials against the Democrats, Trump’s been urging Democrats to impeach him for yet a third time, so he can claim a 3-game winning streak.

“I’m the ultimate impeachment champion,” Trump said. “Nobody gets acquitted in an impeachment trial like Trump – nobody. And not only once, but twice! No matter how hard Pelosi and Schumer try, they just can’t defeat me. So, you know what? I’m challenging the Democrats to impeach me for yet a third time so I can be 3-0, making me the undisputed king of impeachments.”

Trump added in a later statement that he hopes his unprecedented win makes it to the Guinness World Records for winning the most impeachments in history.

Following Trump’s remarks, Democrats promised they’ll keep on impeaching Trump until they get a conviction or until they completely destroy the country, whichever happens first.

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Rafi Metz

Rafi is the king of satire, a master of his trade. Nobody is immune to his hyperbolic and satirical outrage. Nobody is spared from being the object of his incessant mockery. Because at the end of the day, everyone is a parody of themselves.

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