There’s nothing worse than being a threat to democracy. It’s the greatest of all sins. To ensure you aren’t a threat to democracy, keep an eye out for these troubling signs. If you check off any one of these boxes, get help ASAP:

• You constantly correct people and tell them we’re a constitutional republic, not a democracy. That’s definitely a threat to democracy.

• You question the results of elections when Democrats win. How dare you!

• You eat hot dogs on a bun with ketchup instead of mustard. Disgraceful.

• You eat pizza with a fork. Ditto.

• You believe that streets, which were made for cars, should be reserved only for…cars, not bicycles. You’re definitely of the extremist variety.

• You don’t believe in radical gender theory. Someone should call the gender police ASAP.

• You don’t support the murder of innocent babies in the womb up until birth. Call the FBI!

• Your name is Karen but you don’t harass innocent people. A dereliction of duty!

• You only wear ten masks in public and only got 10 COVID boosters. You’re gonna kill everybody!

• Talking about the dangers of cancel culture. You’re cancelled!

Well, there you have it everyone. We hope you found this enlightening. If you know anyone who’s done anything on this list, be sure to report them to the FBI. For the sake of democracy!

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