Man who accidentally left 300,000 guns for Taliban gives lecture on gun control
WASHINGTON, DC—The man who accidentally left 300,000 guns for the Taliban and is sending millions of dollars in weapons to...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Biden to confiscate all Americans’ guns to give them to Ukraine
Washington D.C. - In a shocking move that has left gun rights advocates reeling, President Joe Biden has announced that...
AOC: If gun control doesn’t work, then why aren’t there any shootings in gun-free zones?
This is so infuriating. Shame on the NRA. Shame on the GOP. Shame on that state! After another mass shooting,...
Biden calls for national day of mourning for trans person who was viciously misgendered after mostly peacefully killing some people
(CNN) WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has announced that he will be calling for a national day of mourning for Audrey...
BREAKING: Rob Reiner hospitalized with severe addiction to AI-generated Trump arrest porn
NEW YORK–Vocal leftist Rob Reiner was hospitalized yesterday with a severe addiction to Trump arrest porn. Reiner fell victim to...
Pornhub launches new section for AI-generated Trump arrest porn
US—Nothing gets a beta male soy boy hotter than AI-generated images of former President Donal Trump being arrested in New...
BREAKING: In response to Biden’s illegal business deal with China, DOJ to arrest Donald Trump
WASHINGTON, DC—In response to new revelations of illegal business dealings with China, The Department of Justice have issued an arrest...
Brave local man cuts off his penis so that other men won’t rape people with theirs
SPRINGFIELD—A brave local man, Hugh Janus, has cut off his penis so that other men won't rape people. This follows...
CNN: How global thermonuclear war could be great for your skin
In the beauty world, achieving a glowing complexion is the ultimate goal. And what better way to get that radiant...
Jimmy Carter asks Joe Biden to give his eulogy as the only president who can make him look good by comparison
PLAINS, Georgia—Former President Jimmy Carter has reportedly asked President Joe Biden to give his eulogy, citing Biden's ability to make...
