BREAKING: Arsonist blames climate change for making him start the Spokane fire
SPOKANE, Wash. — A 37-year-old man charged with starting a wildfire near Spokane told investigators that climate change induced a...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Sen Mitch McConnell has tragically died tomorrow
WASHINGTON — Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) died tomorrow afternoon at approximately 3:17 p.m. Eastern Time, according to a statement released...
WNBA to start all games with Caitlin Clark receiving 5 fouls for getting punched in the face
INDIANAPOLIS — The WNBA has instructed referees to facilitate a formal lineup of opposing players who will punch Caitlin Clark...
Rep. Ocasio-Cortez Invents Groundbreaking Car That Runs on Neither Gas Nor Electricity
WASHINGTON — Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez announced Thursday the development of a new mode of personal transportation designed to eliminate reliance...
Branch Covidians Hold Solemn Candlelight Vigil After Fauci Invokes 5th Amendment on Everything
WASHINGTON — Dozens of masked adherents of the Branch Covidians gathered on the National Mall Tuesday evening for a candlelight...
Fauci Testifies He Does Not Recall There Was a Pandemic
WASHINGTON — Dr. Anthony Fauci told a congressional committee on Wednesday that he has no recollection of a global pandemic...
Trump Proposes Replacing Congress with AI Chatbot That Does Nothing Just Like Congress but Would Be Free
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump on Tuesday proposed dissolving Congress and replacing it with a free artificial intelligence chatbot that...
Europe Horrified That Attacker Wasn’t CIS White Man
EUROPE—Officials, media commentators, and progressive advocacy groups reacted with visible dismay this week after authorities confirmed that the individual responsible...
Local Man Rails Against Mass Surveillance Flock Camera Into His Own Mass Surveillance Camera
A local resident spent several minutes Monday morning objecting to a newly installed Flock Safety license-plate reader mounted on a...
Exclusive: Trump Bagged Endangered Stegosaurus on Private African Safari, Circa 2003
In a previously unreported episode from the early 2000s, Donald J. Trump successfully hunted and killed an endangered stegosaurus during...
