Hillary Clinton to dress up as president for 10th straight Halloween
CHAPPAQUA, NY—Secretary Hillary Clinton has decided she will dress up as president of the United States for the 10th straight...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Haiti Demands the US Stop Sending Back Haitian Doctors and Engineers That Were Helping the US
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Oct. 26 — The Haitian government has formally requested that the United States stop deporting or encouraging the voluntary...
Brazil Supreme Court Rules Leftists May Continue Voting Until They Win
BRASÍLIA — Brazil’s Supreme Court ruled Sunday that leftist voters may cast additional ballots in any election until their preferred...
Talarico Polling Near 100 Percent Among Texas Lizard People
AUSTIN — State Rep. James Talarico holds the support of nearly all respondents in a new survey of Texas lizard...
Biblical Scholars Now Conclude Eve Answered “Not to My Knowledge” When Asked About the Fruit
Scholars reviewing early textual traditions now conclude that Eve responded “not to my knowledge” when asked whether she had eaten...
Ilhan Omar Pleads the Fifth 113 Times on Whether Her Husband Is Her Brother
WASHINGTON — Rep. Ilhan Omar invoked her Fifth Amendment right against self-incrimination 113 times on Wednesday when asked whether her...
Clever Wife Finds Twentieth New Place to Hide the Car Keys This Month
A local woman has located a new spot for the car keys, marking the twentieth such discovery this month. The...
Louvre Hosts Open House for Looters; “Girl with the Suicidal Empathy” Left Untouched
PARIS — The Louvre Museum held an open house for looters on Tuesday. Attendees removed objects from multiple galleries. The...
Trump Taps Sydney Sweeney as New Press Secretary, Pledges “Nothing but Policy”
WASHINGTON — President Trump announced that actress Sydney Sweeney will serve as White House Press Secretary. In her first briefing,...
Left-Wingers Hold Massive Campaign Rallies for Right-Wing Party All Around France
PARIS — In what political analysts are calling one of the most effective grassroots operations of the 2027 campaign cycle,...
