BREAKING: Dr. Jill Biden tests positive for COVID-19
In a shocking turn of events, Dr. Jill Biden, First Lady of the United States, has tested positive for COVID-19....
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Biden comforts Florida hurricane victims with harrowing story of a devastating fart that blew all of his classified documents around
In a surprising attempt at empathizing with hurricane-stricken Floridians, President Biden shared a harrowing tale that left many scratching their...
Biden urges Floridians to protect themselves from Hurricane Idalia by ‘getting vaccinated now’
In an unexpected twist, President Biden has unveiled his latest strategy for disaster preparedness: encouraging Floridians to protect themselves from...
BREAKING: Eminem sends cease and desist to the white M&Ms to stop imitating him
In a stunning turn of events, rap superstar Eminem has reportedly sent a cease and desist letter to the iconic...
CNN corrects problematic MLK ‘I Have a Dream’ speech for modern audience
ATLANTA—CNN producers have corrected the deeply problematic "I Have a Dream" speech by Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. along...
‘Look at this Photograph!’
Look at this photographEvery time I do, it makes me laughHow did our eyes get so red?And what the hell...
BREAKING: Stacey Abrams indicted for ‘subverting election’ just like Trump
ATLANTA—Former Georgia gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams and 18 co-defendants have been indicted on the same counts of breaking a variety of...
Biden promises to help those hit by Hawaiian wildfires by giving another $10 billion to Ukraine
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of global diplomacy and financial allocation, President* Biden has unveiled a groundbreaking plan to address...
BREAKING: Trump indictment includes charge that he failed to return a Blockbuster VHS tape in 1993
NEW YORK—A Manhattan Grand Jury has indicted former President Donald Trump for failing to return a Blockbuster video in 1993....
BREAKING: Biden finally visits Hawaii for a nice vacation upwind of devastating wildfires
In a groundbreaking move that has left both citizens and palm trees in awe, President* Biden has announced his long-awaited...
