Biden appears on ‘The View’ and finally becomes smartest guy in the room
NEW YORK—After nearly 3 ½ years as president and over 50 years in public office, President* Joe Biden has finally achieved what many thought was impossible—being the smartest guy in the room. The historic moment will occur during his upcoming appearance on “The View,” a daytime talk show known for its lively discussions and unique grasp of current events.
“The entire staff and crew are over the moon with excitement,” said producer Oran G. Manbad. “We’ve already Scotch Guarded the couch and covered it with plastic, just in case he has an accident. We know this is going to be a big day for Joe—and our upholstery.”
To accommodate Biden’s demanding schedule, the live show will air at 10:00 a.m., which aligns perfectly with the President’s 15-minute window of lucidity. “We’re really thrilled that we won’t have to deal with prime-time Joe. This is the sweet spot when he’s at his sharpest,” Manbad added, visibly relieved.
The cast of “The View” has been busy preparing for this momentous occasion, with Whoopi Goldberg rehearsing her best nods and Joy Behar practicing her shocked expressions. “We’re all just excited to meet him and finally ask the tough questions like, ‘Mr. President, boxers or briefs?’” said co-host Sunny Hostin.
Sources say the producers have also enlisted the help of a team of handlers to make sure Biden stays on track, doesn’t wander off set, or mistake a cardboard cutout of Barbara Walters for an audience member.
As the show’s security team gears up for Biden’s appearance, the Secret Service is reportedly bracing for any spontaneous naps or sudden outbursts of nostalgia about the days of rotary phones and corn pop.
“It’s going to be a historic moment,” said Manbad. “We’re just glad Joe finally found a room where he can shine.”