David Koch, inventor of water pollution and founder of the Nazi Party, is dead at 79

The Left is celebrating the death of inventor and businessman David Koch, who invented such diabolical things as water pollution and human torture.

Koch was a billionaire and philanthropist but focused much of his efforts on ruining the lives of all humans on Earth.

“Unfortunately, David died before he could kill off so many other people he wished to kill,” family spokesman Greyson Poupon said.

Koch will also be remembered for his part in founding the Nazi Party in Germany before he was born.

“The only regret he really had was not being able to finally kill Superman.”

Leftist around the country expressed their joy at hearing about the demise of someone so clearly evil: