Democrats Win Congressional Baseball Game After Run Recount at 2am

Despite early run tallies calling for a Republican victory, Democrats won the annual Congressional baseball game when extra runs were found following the game at 2am.

The game initially ended with the GOP winning 10-0. As the fans left the stadium, the fire alarm was set off and boxes of mail-in runs were found during the commotion. The score was recounted, altering the final tally to 10-13.

Republican lawmakers called for an audit of the score. Democrats responded by calling them “conspiracy theorists” and “threats to democracy.”

Despite the record-setting amount of runs, Democrats have been suspiciously quiet in touting their accomplishment. Their players didn’t even practice beforehand. They stayed in their basements for months before the game.

To avoid another sluggish start next year, Democrat players announced plans to completely open American borders to recruit new players. Republicans objected, insisting those people come in, but legally.


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