Dozens protest attack on women’s rights without being able to define ‘women’

WASHINGTON, DC—Dozens of protesters descended on the nation’s capital to protest an attack on women’s rights despite not being able to define “women”. The protest follows the leaking of a Supreme Court decision, which will overturn Roe v Wade, the landmark abortion case from 1971.

“I’m here to protest this vile attack on women’s rights,” activist Hugh Janus said. “But don’t ask me to define women because I’m not a biologist.”

President* Biden’s first Supreme Court nominee Ketanji Brown Jackson bravely took a stand against biology in her Senate confirmation hearing by declining to define “woman.”

A small group of counter-protesters protested the people protesting the attack on women’s rights because none of them were biologists because “how would they know?”

Protesters carried signs that read, “Bans off my body,” “WHAT is a woman?” and “What do I look like a biologist?”

Activists claim that, while they can’t define what a woman is, they know just enough to understand that a woman has the right to kill her child.

“Look, just because I can’t tell you what a woman is or when life begins because I’m not a biologist, I know that killing an innocent human being is healthcare,” Janus said. “It’s really simple.”


"Excuse me, has this joke been fact-checked?"

Bypass Zuck and his minions and receive hilarious "unauthorized" satire to your inbox, every day.

We don’t spam! Read our privacy policy for more info.