In a bold move of class and style during a chaotic time, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) wore commemorative toilet paper earrings during a press conference announcing the Democratic plan to outlaw coronavirus from America.

Video of the conference shows the elegant fashion accessory dangling with delight in the breeze caused by Pelosi’s wobbly inebriated head and hot air:

I for one am proud to have Speaker Pelosi represent me as an American in this time of crisis.

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Exavier Saskagoochie

Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He’s really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!

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