WASHINGTON DC—At a live press conference, President-Elect Kanye West announced President Donald Trump will be the Secretary of State in his administration.

Thinking it was a joke, the press pool laughed upon the announcement until the lights turned off and Donald Trump entered the room to ‘Enter Sandman’ playing over the speakers. The audience began screaming. Jim Acosta’s head exploded.

“I will be the best Secretary of State,” the President told reporters. “All other Secretaries of State? Total disasters.”

The announcement shocked the nation, giving us an early glimpse into the upcoming West administration. OAN pundits said Kanye is “the greatest President ever since Donald Trump.” Vice called President-Elect West a “white supremacist.”

Fellow self-proclaimed President-Elect Joe Biden even commented on the announcement, “Look fat, if you like Kanye instead of me, you ain’t black! Truaninonfodoprzure!”

MSNBC praised Joe Biden for his brilliant response and his own Secretary of State pick, whoever it is.

“I’m going to make secretaries great again,” President Trump said at the press conference. “You know it. I know it. Everybody knows it.”

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Richie Richards

Very stable genius, Richie Richards, is a writer, illustrator and fake news journalist. Check out Bowie Bee Learns About Democracy, the latest in his Bowie Bee children’s series.

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