BREAKING: Russia threatens to nuke East & West coast US; most Americans pretty okay with that

MOSCOW—A member of Russia’s Parliament warned the U.S. that President Vladimir Putin could wipe out the East and West Coasts with just four nuclear missiles.

Alexei Zhuravlev, speaking earlier this month on state TV channel Russia-1, said that Moscow had the capability to launch a nuclear attack on the U.S over its support of Ukraine and could “annihilate both US coasts with just four nuclear weapons.”

A poll by the Pew Pew Center showed that a majority of Americans would be “pretty okay” with that scenario.

“Well, they’d get rid of all the commies in New York, California, and Washington, DC of course and would leave the hardworking conservatives in the rest of the country. That’s fine by me,” Jerry Jabba of Tulsa, Oklahoma said.

Even Americans in the coastal danger zone seemed to favor the idea.

“America is the worst. I hate Russia but I would be fine with them nuking both coasts even if it meant I would die in a fiery holocaust here in Oregon,” Forest Gump of Portland said.

“I tell you with full competence that to destroy the entirety of the East Coast of the United States, we only need two Sarmat missiles — two!” Zhuravlev said, referring to Russia’s new intercontinental ballistic missiles.

“And another two for the West Coast. Four missiles, that’s it — there will be nothing left.”


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