Breaking: Bill Clinton Adopts Eric Swalwell: “He’s The Son I Never Had”
Little Rock, AR – In a move described by insiders as both “heartwarming” and “legally inventive,” former President Bill Clinton...
Eric Swalwell
BREAKING: Eric Swalwell resigns from Congress for stuff he totally didn’t do
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a stunning development that surprised absolutely no one paying attention, Rep. Eric Swalwell (D-Calif.) announced his...
Swalwell Transitions to Black Woman, Prompting Immediate Dismissal of All Sexual Assault Allegations
WASHINGTON — Facing mounting calls to drop out of the California gubernatorial race after four women accused him of sexual...
Trade war escalates: Trump slaps 125% tariff on all of Eric Swalwell’s Chinese spy lovers
Washington, D.C. – The U.S.-China trade war reached a fever pitch this week as President Donald Trump announced a staggering...
BREAKING: Inciting insurrections is okay again
WASHINGTON, DC—Congresspeople Eric Swalwell and Liz Warren have come forward to announce that inciting insurrections is now an acceptable political...
Congress Votes Unanimously: AOC Must Wear “Special” Cap In Hearings Or Interviews
WASHINGTON, DC—As people around the country are worried about a divided government, Congress has done the unbelievable. All 435 members...
BREAKING: All charges against George Santos dropped after he identifies as a Cherokee Indian veteran who slept with a Chinese spy
WASHINGTON, DC—In a surprising twist that could rival the most intricate plot twists from a spy novel, charges against U.S....
BREAKING: AOC forced to pay a carbon offset penalty for her livestream flatulent
WASSHINGTON, DC—Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY), often recognized for her passionate climate advocacy, has found herself in hot air - quite...
Biden releases tell-all book about 2020 election ‘The Art of the Steal’
WASHINGTON DC--Self-identifying President-Elect Joe Biden has released a tell-all book called "The Art of the Steal" documenting the miraculous 2020...
BREAKING: Rep. Swalwell: ‘Russian hackers made me sleep with Chinese spy’
SAN FRANCISCO—US Representative Eric Swalwell has admitted to sleeping with a Chinese spy during his ascent to the House but...
