Yes, Black Lives Matter… Unless They Disagree with Liberals 
9/11 Drone Show to Recreate Perfectly Intact Hijacker Passport Escaping Fiery Inferno 
NCAA Rules Michigan May Keep Playing Until They Win 
Local Wife Poised to Win Husband’s Fantasy Football League Again After Making Zero Moves All Season 
McConnell Eyes Next Week for First Senate Appearance Since Dying Eight Weeks Ago 
Yes, Black Lives Matter… Unless They Disagree with Liberals
I need everyone to sit down, hydrate, and stop treating Black people like a mascot you only pull out when...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
9/11 Drone Show to Recreate Perfectly Intact Hijacker Passport Escaping Fiery Inferno
WASHINGTON — The Department of Homeland Security on Friday approved a multi-act commemorative drone display for the 25th anniversary of...
NCAA Rules Michigan May Keep Playing Until They Win
INDIANAPOLIS — In an unprecedented act of sportsmanship, the NCAA announced Thursday that all University of Michigan athletic teams will...
Local Wife Poised to Win Husband’s Fantasy Football League Again After Making Zero Moves All Season
US—A local woman is once again the early favorite to win her husband’s 12-team fantasy football league, according to last...
McConnell Eyes Next Week for First Senate Appearance Since Dying Eight Weeks Ago
WASHINGTON — Senate Republicans are preparing for Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) to return to the Capitol next week, his first...
Mayor Mamdani to Host Inaugural Dueling Jenga Competition at 9/11 Memorial
NEW YORK — Mayor Zohran Mamdani announced Wednesday that the city will host its first official “Dueling Jenga Invitational” at...
Travis Kelce first NFL player to miss opener because he’s pregnant
KANSAS CITY, Mo. — Travis Kelce will miss the Chiefs’ season opener after team physicians confirmed he is pregnant, making...
Jeffrey Dahmer exonerated after jury finds he just had a bad case of being ‘hangry’
MILWAUKEE — Jeffrey Dahmer was found not guilty Thursday after a jury concluded the deaths of 17 young men were...
Men Can Totally Get Pregnant, but They Can’t Have an Opinion About Postpartum Depression Because They Can’t Get Pregnant
I need everyone to sit down, drink some water, and stop treating other people’s uteruses like a group chat they...
Local dad proud of the beautiful grass he grew out of a crack in the driveway
US—A local father announced Monday that he has finally successfully grown “really nice grass,” pointing to a three-inch clump of...