BREAKING: Biden devours several children in playful new Halloween sacrifice ritual at White House
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has been caught on camera devouring several children in a new Halloween sacrifice tradition at the...
Joe Biden
BREAKING: Oscar the Grouch Endorses Trump After Biden’s Garbage Comment
SESAME STREET—Long time resident Oscar the Grouch surprised the nation today by officially endorsing Donald Trump for president, citing President...
Biden: ‘Garbage Trump supporters need to tone down the rhetoric or I’ll annihilate them all with tactical nukes and F-18s’
WASHINGTON, DC—In yet another one of his signature "folksy" moments, President* Joe Biden addressed escalating political tensions during a recent...
Democrats stunned to learn that hatred of Trump can’t buy groceries or gas
Democratic voters nationwide are coming to the grim realization that seething hatred for Donald Trump isn’t an acceptable form of...
Biden: ‘It’s okay that Kamala has IQ of a fence post; the president doesn’t do anything anymore anyway’
REHOBOTH BEACH, DE — Speaking from a beach chair while sipping lemonade on his seemingly permanent taxpayer-funded vacation, President* Joe...
BREAKING: Joe Biden re-enters presidential race after seeing Kamala Harris lose
In a surprising move, President Joe Biden has officially re-entered the 2024 presidential race, just days after watching Vice President...
Climate Goddess Greta Thunberg declares Hurricane Milton will spare followers’ homes if they paint their doors with aborted fetus blood
Climate Goddess Greta Thunberg has issued an urgent decree to her devout followers: **Hurricane Milton will bypass their homes—**if they...
BREAKING: North Carolina changes its name to Ukraine to get federal funding after devastating Hurricane Helene
RALEIGH, NC—In a bold move to secure desperately needed federal funding in the wake of Hurricane Helene, North Carolina Governor...
Victims of Hurricane Helene identifying as illegal immigrants so they can get some federal aid from the Biden-Harris administration
ASHVILLE, NC—Victims of Hurricane Helene in North Carolina have discovered a clever life hack: identifying as illegal immigrants in order...
BREAKING: Joe Biden endorses Donald Trump in 2024 presidential race in stunning October Surprise
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking twist that has left political pundits scrambling, President Joe Biden has officially endorsed his longtime rival,...
