BREAKING: Insurrection is okay again
WASHINGTON, DC—The once-reviled act of undermining democratic institutions, has been given a stunning facelift. It appears that insurrection, historically frowned...
Year: 2024
Dems Pretend to be Excited About Moronic Descendant of Slave Owners That No One Voted For
WASHINGTON, DC—Democrat voter Lou Nee is over the moon to have a chance to vote for someone whose family owned...
POLL: What’s a good slogan for the Kamala Harris and Pete Buttigieg ticket?
The Harris campaign will be using whatever name is selected in this poll:
BREAKING: White smoke billowing from White House signifies that the Deep State has selected a new puppet to head the government
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a scene reminiscent of the Vatican conclave, white smoke billowed from the chimneys of the White...
FACT CHECK: No, Kamala Harris isn’t offering fellatio to everyone who votes for her
A viral social media post has falsely claimed that Vice President* Kamala Harris is offering fellatio to everyone who votes...
Reasons to vote for Kamala Harris in 2024
Some people think that there are no reasons to vote for Kamala Harris or that the only reason is that...
Not to be outdone by Trump’s sneakers, Kamala Harris releases line of golden knee pads
In a bold move to outshine her political rival, former Vice President Kamala Harris has unveiled her latest venture: a...
Biden Stepping Down ‘Since Assassinating My Opponent Didn’t Work’
In what some Democrats are calling a “stutter” and a “goof”, President* Biden said his main reason for stepping out...
BREAKING: Biden has been informed that he definitely doesn’t want to run for president anymore
WASHINGTON, DC—In a surprising twist, President* Joe Biden has been informed that he no longer wants to run for president...
Crowdstrike CEO: ‘Internet shutdown was successful test run for the real thing coming in November’
AUSTIN—Crowdstrike CEO Shawn Henry has announced that the recent nationwide internet shutdown, which affected voting machines and 911 service, was...
