JUST IN: Unbiased Merchan Jury Instruction: “Ignore Anything That Helps Trump”
NEW YORK—In a groundbreaking move that has left the legal world reeling, New York Judge Juan Merchan has issued a...
Year: 2024
Creative Ways to Use Custom Fluorescent Signs in 2024
Remember those old, dusty motel signs buzzing with neon? While they hold a certain vintage charm, the lighting has gotten...
BREAKING: Robert de Niro claims Trump raped him back in the ’90s too
NEW YORK—In a shocking and bizarre turn of events, legendary actor Robert de Niro has accused former President Donald Trump...
BREAKING: Trump announces Baron Trump as his VP pick
In a move that has left political analysts scrambling and late-night comedians rejoicing, former President Donald Trump announced today that...
Biden celebrates Memorial Day by thanking all the dead Civil War veterans who will vote for him in November
WASHINGTON, DC—In a touching and heartfelt display of patriotism, President Joe Biden celebrated Memorial Day this year by thanking all...
EXCLUSIVE: George Floyd celebrates 4 years of sobriety
MINNEAPOLIS, MN—George Floyd, patron saint of fentanyl, celebrated four consecutive drug-free years today. Mr. Floyd famously quit taking drugs following his...
Amid skyrocketing inflation, Joe Biden recommends Americans ‘stop being so poor’
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of forward-thinking leadership, President Joe Biden has unveiled a groundbreaking new plan to tackle the...
MEMORIAL DAY: Nation mourns George Floyd who died when his spaceship exploded in 2020
US—This Memorial Day, the nation is mourning NASA legend George Floyd who died two years ago when his spaceship exploded...
WNBA Suspends Star Player Caitlyn Clark for Being Too White and Straight
INDIANAPOLIS—The Women's National Basketball Association (WNBA) has imposed sanctions on their most popular player, Caitlyn Clark, for the heinous crime...
EXCLUSIVE: Lone Survivor of Iranian Helicopter Crash Tells Harrowing Tale
TEHRAN—Iranian helicopter pilot Hilla Reik Linton has emerged as the sole survivor of a catastrophic crash that left no other...
